Wednesday, June 27, 2007

We are friends...

I don't think I've made mention of Vegan as of late. Last week, I had posted that we were fizzling. Well, we spoke this weekend and I went to hang out with him last night. I really like Vegan, but have come to the realization that there will never be anything more between us than friendship, and I'm good with that. He and I talked about a lot of things last night, most of all me. He pointed out issues that I have that I thought I had hidden so well that no one really knew about them. Well, I guess I was wrong. Some of the things he told me, I already knew. He brought up other things that I haven't thought about in a while. One thing he told me that sticks out, is the fact that I don't let anyone get REALLY close to me. I'll listen to people talk about their problems all day long, but I never really open up to anyone. I realize that sometimes I care so much about people and want them to feel good that I forget to care about myself. He also made the statement that no one is truly happy, that happiness is a myth...all anyone can really hope for is to be content. I have always said, "I just want to be happy." But, if what he says is true, then I am looking for an unattainable feeling. I mean, for the most part I think I am a genuinely happy person, the people I used to work with would tell me they wanted to slap the smile off my face sometimes. (that was usually when they were having a bad day) Even when I'm in a bad mood, I still try to laugh. Am I living in a dream land??? The majority of my friends are married or are in relationships and they seem pretty happy. Oh well, I'm rambling.

Hoochie and I were talking the other day and she asked a question that I have often wondered...

Why is it that some people find that person for them at 20, 21,22 and then there are people like us that have been looking for years and can't find that one that fits us?

So, my friends, there is a question for you all to ponder. If you have any thoughts or maybe even the answer, please let me know.

Until next time...

Single Girl

3 comments:

d.g. said...

I have to say, I don't really agree with Vegan's take on happiness. HOWEVER. I did just have a discussion with my mom regarding a book she's reading, "What Happy People Know." The book states that there are only two real emotions: fear and ... umm, crap, I forgot, the other was either respect or gratitude or something like that. All others, such as love, happiness, anger, etc. are merely intense versions of the two. Which makes sense. So on one hand, I disagree with both Vegan and the author of the book because I'd like to think that achieving HAPPINESS is possible, yet, on the other hand, perhaps it's not really happiness we're chasing, but contentment or whatever. I guess once we obtain it, we feel satisfied, which is essentially happiness.

The point is, whatever it's called, it's just do damn hard to come by ... and that really sucks.

d.g. said...

SO damn ... I hate typos.

sublimenigma said...

Some people say that contentment is where you are when your happy moments outweigh the sad ones.

Maybe half the battle is not chasing happiness so much that you lose sight of the good things you have and can enjoy right now.

I'd say I feel content...but keeping my eyes open for something better. :)