I should have, but I didn't.
I'm sure you've noticed my lack of posts the past week. I've been in a funk for the past week and a half because The Guy and I are no longer seeing each other.
That's right, I've been dumped and when you read the reasoning behind, said dumping, you will understand my state of disbelief.
Here, let me walk you through it...
The Guy and I had a routine...his daughter and her mother live right down the road from me, so when he dropped his daughter off on Sunday evenings he would come straight to my house and stay with me. So, Sunday, February 21 I spoke with him at 5:15p.
Me: Can't wait to see you tonight.
Him: Yeah, I can't stay tonight, but I'm going to come see you for a little bit.
Me: Oh, you're not, why?
Him: I just have some stuff to do at the house.
Me: OK.
Him: Well, let me finish up here and I'll see you in a little bit.
Me: OK
Fast forward to 5:50pm...he calls.
Him: I can't stop by tonight, I have my nephew with me.
Me: Really?
Him: Yeah, but I'm definitely coming over there tomorrow.
Me: OK, whatever.
Him: I'll call you when I get home.
Me: OK.
Now, once we got off the phone, I knew something was off...fast forward to 8:00pm, the phone rings.
Him: Hey, how mad are you?
Me: I don't know, why do you think I'm mad?
Him: Because I blew you off.
Me: That's a pretty good reason, don't you think?
Him: (sounding shitty) I wasn't going to tell my nephew he couldn't come!
Me: Whatever.
Him: Do you want me to just talk to you tomorrow.
Me: No, I want you to tell me what the hell is going on.
Him: I really wanted to talk to you about this face to face tomorrow.
Me: Oh no, I think we need to talk about this right now.
Him: For the past week I've felt like I'm dying inside.
Me: What?
Him: I feel like I've turned my back on God.
Me: Excuse me?
Him: I just think that I need to pray more.
Me: OK.
Him: I feel like an adulterer and think it's best if I devote my life to the Lord.
At this point, I'm pretty quiet because I can't believe what I'm hearing.
Me: So, let me get this straight, you feel as if I've made you turn your back on God?
Him: No, I just think I need to spend more time in church.
Me: So, are you saying you don't want to see me anymore?
Him: I don't know what I want. I'm confused.
More talking
Him: I just don't know what to say.
Me: Well, when you figure it out, why don't you give me a call.
So, there you have it. I was dumped for God...how can you compete with The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit?
And you know, I should have seen it coming. He started going to this church after the first of the year and I noticed he was getting a little more Christian Fundamentalist after each Sunday, but two weeks prior to the dumping he had gotten REALLY bad. He made comments about how he wanted to teach abstinence only to his daughter, which I told him probably wasn't the best thing...sure, tell her the best thing to do is practice abstinence, but you might also want to educate her on safe sex...just in case. All of the sudden he had a massive case of homophobia, which in my opinion is the dumbest kind of phobia, he said things like "It's against God's will." I honestly thought this was just a really strange phase, but the more he said the more I started to think, 'If this phase doesn't end soon, we might have to end soon."
When I told my friend, Shawn, about what had happened he asked me what church he went to and when I told him the name he said, "Oh my God, that's the church that my friend's parents started going to, they brainwash people!" So, after hearing this bit of information I decided to some research on his church...I found out it is an 800 member church and found out that the doctrine they teach is considered by a lot of theologians to be somewhat of a cult. Then, I came across a newspaper article from 2008 that was about a youth minister that had just confessed to a murder that was committed in 1994 when he was 16 years old. Here are some quotes from that article...
He's a hero, really," said Kelley 24. "I don't know how many people would do what he did. The Bible says you just need to confess to God. Calvin took an extra step.
Inman's arrest should be a lesson in integrity, rather than a sinful scandal, many worshippers said.
To lock him away someplace and say he owes it to society is robbing the next generation of a mentor.
Now, don't get me wrong, I understand forgiving people is what your supposed to do, but apparently, this church talks about how homosexuality and premarital sex are horrible...but you can stab a guy in the chest and you want him to minister your youth? I don't get it.
So, it's probably best that this happened now.
Until next time...
Mandy
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
I Didn't See That Coming
Posted by Amanda at 8:33 AM
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6 comments:
Oh my goodness! That is a crazy story, and I think you are much better off without him. But yeah, that's a pretty good one, that he's dumping you so he can spend more time praying.
This is why I am so skeptical about religion. Adultery is wrong, but murder, eh, not so much??
Hello lady,
I know I haven't posted in like FOREVER, but I finally sat down and started reading blogs again. I can't believe that he got all Jesus Freak on you. I'm all for God and all, but even God knows extremism isn't healthy. The Guy obviously IS "confused" if he has to use The Lord as an excuse.
Keep your chin up, girlie.
Is it possible that "The Guy" is cheating on you with his ex? As a "guy" myself, I can honestly say that I've used some pretty creative excuses to cowardly back out of a relationship due to my infidelity or desire for another woman. I mean he may be a religious wacko but don't rule out that the adultery he speaks of the product of a guilty conscious.
On another note, I can’t stand it when people blame God for their own shortcomings. I also hate it when people hate in the name of God. There was a time when people justified hating blacks because they were convinced that we were the children of Canaan and slavery had biblical justifications based on a curse by Noah.
What people don’t realize is that the Bible is a book that was written by men who were inspired by God and then it was translated by men who were inspired by those men. Many things were probably lost in translations… Based on that fact alone it should be said that we should be led by faith and not an extreme dissection of the bible.
Regardless, you are better off without him. Any man that can’t find a way to love God and the woman that God has blessed him with is definitely not worthy of a woman like you. It is definitely a blessing in disguise and God has a way of removing things from your life that can cause you hurt, harm, or danger. We mess it up by refusing to keep those things out of our lives. Keep him out of your life!!
I guess anything is possible, and I've thought that might be a possiblity. But, he has always been honest to a fault, and I'm not sure when he would have had time to cheat...he always answered his phone when I called, always returned texts and he was at my house quite a bit and the phone never rang. Part of me thinks that maybe the church is urging him to try to work things out with his ex-wife. Who knows. I'm doing much better now.
His loss! your way too much fun for someone like that xx
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