Getting My Life Back On Track

Recently, I have been in a funk. Seriously, when I look in the mirror, the first thing that comes to mind is YUCK! Then I wonder, "How did I let myself get this way?" So, I decided that enough was enough. It's time to make some changes.

Change # 1: Quit Smoking.

DONE! I am proud to say that I have not smoked a cigarette since Wednesday, January 21, 2009 - 10:30am...yay me.

This has not been an easy 6 days. I have wanted to cry, I have wanted hit someone in the face (nobody in particular, anyone would do.) I have screamed at my computer for not moving fast enough, and i have chewed so much gum that I now have super hero jaw strength. Probably the hardest time was this last weekend. I DIDN'T GO ANYWHERE. I decided to stay home because there are no cigarettes there and if I left I would have to drive past the Valero where I always purchase my happy, little cancer sticks. I will say this...my apartment has never been as clean as it is right now. Seriously, whenever I wanted to smoke I would clean something. My home looks so pretty right now, that I've made my bed both mornings this week, just so my house can continue to look sparkly! It has been over 144 hours since my last cigarette, and each hour that passes is getting a little easier.

Change # 2: Eat better.

Working on it.

I am a big fan of the hamburger and french fries with the Coke. But, I have come to the realization that if I want to lose weight and feel better, then I have to stop with the fast food. For the past two weeks, I have been cooking more and bringing leftovers to work as well as healthy snacks like grapes, carrot sticks, trail mix, etc... And, I have noticed that I do feel better, not to mention I'm saving money...which is always a good thing.

Change # 3: Start working out.

UGGGHHH, I HATE WORKING OUT!!!

I hate the gym. I know this sounds totally irrational, but when I go to the gym to work out I feel like people are staring at me and thinking, "Gross, looking at that fat girl over there, sweating like a pig, and breathing all of over the elliptical machine totally makes me sick." Or if I take one of their aerobic classes I just wait for the instructor to yell out over the horrible, techno music, "Fat girl in the back...are you OK...we don't want you to have a heart attack!" So, I decided to start in my living room! Last night,I went to the "exercise tv" section of my I Control and looked for something that would ease me in to working out. (I haven't been a non-smoker for very long, I didn't want to blow out a lung on my first exercise tv try.) I found it...A WALKING video. I started reading the about section and it said that the video was 45 minutes long and it was for beginners. So I think to myself, "Walking in place to the beat of music...Beginner...How hard could it be?" The first part of the video was not bad, I was a little winded, but I was keeping up. Then the bitch said, "OK, not it's time for some sculpting exercises." And I was like, "OK, we're going to slow things down and do some crunches or something, this IS a beginner video." We didn't do crunches, no, we did evil leg lunges. About 15 minutes into the video, my face was beet red, my hands were shaking, and breathing was becoming difficult. So, I screamed at the mutant, freak on the television and then turned it off. I have heard of people becoming addicted to working out, I wish I had that addiction. But, I will make myself do it again tonight when I get home...you never know, maybe I'll last 16 minutes.

Wish me luck!

Until next time...

Mandy