I have a big butt. I've always had a big butt. I've come to grips with the fact that I will never have the cute, little, heart-shaped, white girl butt. The one good thing I will say about my butt is that it is more bubble than wide. Friends in school would always joke that they could balance a coke can on my ass when I was standing up.
Here is a picture for proof that I have always had a round ass.
<------See right there, that is not my skirt in motion...my ass is making it poke out like that.
This picture, as you can see, was taken in 1994, my senior year in high school. This is the best shape I have ever been in. And, if you notice, I was not a little girl. I have ALWAYS been curvy.
Now, on to my point... Wednesday night, I was at The Guy's house after work. We were in his bedroom, laying on his bed. The bedroom door was open so there was light shining in, creating shadows of us on the wall. I was laying on my stomach and for some reason turned my head to the left and caught a glimpse of my butt shadow...
Mandy: OH MY GOD! MY BUTT IS THAT BIG!
The Guy: You've got a pretty big butt.
Mandy: I knew that it was big, but I had no idea it was that gigundo!
The Guy: I like your butt.
Mandy: It looks like Mount Everest!
The Guy: Shadows make everything look bigger, (holding up is hand) look how big my hand looks.
Mandy: Seriously, it looks like my ass should have a snow cap!
The Guy brings his hand down and slaps me on the ass.
Mandy: OH MY GOD...NOW IT LOOKS LIKE A JELLO JIGGLER MOLD OF MT. EVEREST!
The Guy: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Looks like it's time to get my ass working out again. BLECHHH!
Until next time...
Mandy
Friday, February 5, 2010
My Anaconda Don't Want None...
Posted by Amanda at 12:21 PM
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2 comments:
I FEEL YOUR PAIN!! AS MOST OF YOUR FRIENDS ALREADY KNOW, YOU GOT YOUR LARGE REAR END FROM ME.
I REMEMBER WHEN I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL, NOBODY MADE JEANS FOR GIRLS. YOU HAD TO BUY GUYS JEANS. AS YOU KNOW, MOST GUYS DON'T HAVE MUCH OF A BUTT. SO, IF I BOUGHT JEANS THAT FIT MY BUTT, THEY WOULD BE ABOUT 8 INCHES TOO BIG IN THE WAIST. I REMEMBER MY MOTHER HAVING TO RUN DARTS IN THE BACK WAIST OF MY JEANS TO CONTOUR TO MY PROTRUDING BUTTOCKS.
AT LEAST WOMAN TODAY CAN FIND JEANS THAT FIT PROPERLY. UMMMM, MAKE THAT FIT BETTER. I STILL CAN'T FIND A PAIR THAT FITS BOTH WAIST AND BOTTOM!!
MOM
My butt has totally spread out as I've gotten older. It sucks.
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